Bartes and Mildred Alphin: My Heritage

 Bartes and Mildred Alphin (approx. 2010)

I love all my grandparents very dearly, but today I would like to talk about my father's parents. It has been over a year since my grandfather passed, and over three years since my grandmother passed. Born in the 1920's, they watched as the world around them shifted with each and every decade. It's amazing to thing that, while they were young, things such as the garbage disposal (1927) electric guitar (1931), the pH meter (1935), ATMs (1939), the space observatory (1946), the defibrillator (1947),  the artificial heart (1952), and the radar gun (1954) were invented. My grandparents saw so much in their lifetime, and they heritage they have left me is irreplaceable.

What is my inheritance? As a child, we would visit them about twice a year, on Christmas or Thanksgiving, and during the summer also. My grandparents always woke up early. I was quite the early bird at that age, so I would wake up around 6:30-8 am almost every day. I would wake up and walk upstairs and find 2 things: a box of fresh glazed doughnuts and my grandparents, sitting in their chairs. Every morning, Grandpa would go to the grocery store and buy us doughnuts for breakfast. They woke up to pray and to read their Bible. I found them so many times just peacefully reading. They loved God and His word more than anything else, and they loved to talk about it.

My grandparents gave me an inheritance of honesty and being the best one could be. They believed in always being honest, no matter what. They were hard workers. Grandma and Grandpa had a very large family (12 children), and they worked so hard to make sure everything was provided. My grandfather gave me my stubbornness. Despite bad hips, health problems, and a missing thumb (work accident), I would occasionally find my carpenter grandfather in his wood shop in the back of the house building something. He pushed through no matter what problem came his way. My grandmother taught me to always be ready to show love. She always had a kind word and a smile available for anyone, and she was never angry. Even if Grandpa was a little grumpy, it would never change her disposition. She was naturally a happy person, always ready to make a happy comment or show someone she cared. She would crochet clothes for our dolls, and she wrote us letters often. They both loved people, and they were always ready to help someone if a problem showed. They gave me an inheritance of compassion. They cared about people, and they cared about each other. They loved each other very much. It was in their actions, their words, their way of being with each other. My gruff grandfather softened up whenever my grandmother was involved. And my grandmother always did her best to take care of him.

I remember the phone calls that we used to have. They always asked about school, and about church. It was so important to them that we receive a good education. They always encouraged us to put our best into our studies and do our best. They were always proud of us. But the parts of those phone calls that I will always remember is when they spoke of God. My grandparents were stalwart believers and they had great relationships with God. I didn't fully realize how meaningful their words were until later on, because I was so young, but now I am so thankful that my grandparents encouraged me. They would encourage me to pray, read my Bible, and keep believing. They would tell me, "Jesus is coming soon; don't stop believing. Keep praying and seeking God." Even in the letters Grandma sent, she would encourage us. And when we would leave them to go back home to Ohio, we would all pray together. My grandparents weren't pastors, neither were they what we would consider ministers. They were just simple country people. But they impacted so many peoples' lives because of their faith in God. I will always remember those phone calls. I can still hear their thick Arkanzan accents, encouraging me to keep the faith.

I called Grandpa once, and I remember that he was in such a good mood, telling me that he had been listening to sermons and gospel music all day long. At that point he was not getting out much at all, so that was his opportunity to hear God's Word. He told me that he was so thankful for it, he didn't know how he would manage without. He loved to be in God's presence; they both did. They were always sad when they weren't able to make it to church.

When my grandfather was on his deathbed last year, Grandpa's pastor and his wife, my parents, and I stood around his hospital bed and pray and sing. Grandpa and Grandma loved the old hymns. We would stand in that hospital room singing about God's peace and love, and that peace would just fill the room. I was able to watch my grandfather slowly slip away from this world, knowing that he would one day step into the throne room of Jesus Christ. I had peace, because I knew that this man of God would be dancing on streets of gold... no walker and no pain.

This is my heritage: good Christian character and a love for God. My grandparents can be pleased to know that, if that was what they were trying to accomplish, then they succeeded.

 (2010)

(I was probably 5-7)

(2014, about 2 months before my grandfather's passing)

Obituary for Mildred Leona Alphin 

Obituary for Bartes Elisha Alphin 

Have a great day! Remember, keep the faith.

Candace Nicole

The God of Unrequited Love

In Christianity, we teach that God is love, and that He loves unconditionally. This is absolutely true, and the Bible speaks often of this. Many of us have sang "Jesus Loves Me," which we've known since we were young children. We quote John 3:16, tell others of God's love... As Christians, His love is very important to us. It is unconditional, everlasting, unchanging, unfailing... there are not enough adjectives to describe God's love. But, there's one facet of His love that we seem to ignore. Which one? Unrequited love.

The definition of unrequited, according to Merriam Webster, is not reciprocated or returned in kind; not requited. Looking at simple English etymology, the prefix "un-" means the opposite of, or not. To requite is simply to return or retaliate.

Now, I know that unrequited love is not a nice topic. It's painful, and brings back memories of when we ourselves loved unrequitedly. It is a hard subject. And, I think that, because of the weight of our own memories, we tend to not pay attention to this part of God's love. We don't want to think that God loves us unrequitedly, because then we must face the fact that we have turned God away and hurt Him countless times simply because we have not received His love. Think about it for a moment. There are around 6 billion people in this world, and God loves all of them. How many people, do you think, do not return His love? How many people chase after gods who are not real? How many people simply shun God? We may love many people in our lives, and we may even love some with a God-like love. Imagine someone that you love unconditionally, say, your husband, if you're married. If you found that they had been robbing banks, you would forgive and still love them. Your love wouldn't fade, no matter what they did. That's unconditional love. Now, imagine that person suddenly leaving you. You know how you would feel; I don't need to spell it out for you. This person is gone, and you still love them. That is unrequited love. Now, imagine if you loved 6+ billion people unconditionally, and many of them didn't feel the same way about you. How would you feel? It's the same with God. But, I believe it is on a larger scale, because He is the way for all to be saved.

Imagine you're a doctor, and you've just found the cure for cancer. You walk up to your patient, who is on the brink of death, and tell them, "I've found a cure for your cancer! Let's start as soon as possible so you can be well soon!" They reply, "No! Don't cure me! I'm perfectly happy as I am now. Why would I want to change? Don't come near me!" How would you feel? Now, let's step it up a notch. Again, you're the doctor, but this person is someone that you love unconditionally. The same scene plays out. How would you feel now? Bingo. God loves us all unconditionally, and he has the way for us to be saved. If God was that doctor, and we the patient, how would that conversation take place? We would want that cure, wouldn't we? You would think so. There are 6+ billion people in the world today; think of how many people do not follow the true path of salvation. Now, this can be because they don't know what is true; they could be deceived. But, there are also many people who simply refuse God because they want to. God loves them unconditionally, but also unrequitedly.

A few days ago, I was thinking about Christ and his unconditional love, and that is when I realized that God loved unrequitedly also, not just unconditionally. I believe that unrequited love is one of the strongest types of unconditional love. It is easy to love someone who openly loves you back. But to love someone who does not return that love? It is one of the most difficult things to endure. And, God endures that every single day from countless people.

We know of unrequited love. It is spoken of in music, poetry, films, books... everywhere you look, there it is. But, if we stopped for a moment, and thought of how God loves unrequitedly, not just unconditionally... think of how many people hurt Him, day after day, and yet His love for them never dies... our lives as Christians would change drastically. God is reaching out to all of us, wanting to love us. Will we let him?

How will the story end?

I found this a couple months ago in Helsinki. "I'M ALONE. I NEED LOVE." I took a photo of it nearly as soon as I saw it, because it made me think very hard. How desperate, how hopeless must this person's life be, that they would feel that it was necessary to reach out to people that they will probably never meet? How destitute must they feel, that they could not even rely on their family or friends? How hurt were they? How lonely, how depressed? In a place where many things were written, some of it not very clean and rather stupid, there is a message from someone begging for love. Everyone needs love. It is a natural desire; we wish to feel that we are loved, that we are needed. Without love, life is pretty much hopeless. We need it in our lives daily. I try to tell my family and friends that I love them as much as I can, because I understand that it is important. I know what it feels like to wonder if one is loved or not. Because of this, I want to be sure that those close to me know that I love them. But let's get back to the subject: how does the story end?

As I said earlier, how hopeless must this person be? How often do you go to complete strangers, or write to people that you will never meet, and tell them that you are alone and need love? You wouldn't do it at all! You would go to a close friend or someone that you trusted and tell them. So, how desperate must this person have been? I think they must have been horribly desperate. How does the story end? This person probably has about 4 options. 1) They trudge on through life, hoping for that day when they will discover love. 2) They sleep around/have a one-night stand with the promise of love, but they'll most likely end up feeling worse than before. 3) They end everything and commit suicide. 4) They find someone who will introduce them to Jesus Christ and they will feel His undying love.

What do you think is the ending? How does this story end? We will probably never know. But think, there are millions of stories that are the same, billions even. People who feel lonely and unloved. People who just want to know that they are important, that they are appreciated, needed, and loved. We all know these people. We may not realize it, but we do. There are people in our lives that feel this way. What are we doing about it? What are we, as followers of Christ, doing to show these people God's love?

I did a post a little bit ago about conditional love versus unconditional love. I'll try to not bring up the same points, but there is something that we need to consider. The Bible speaks often of taking care of others and showing them God's love. This is one of the main points of missionaries: we go out into the world and show God's love. Someone once said that everyone is a missionary whether they realize it or not. You are the missionary to your neighborhood, your workplace, your school... what surrounds your life is your mission field. If we looked at our lives and our surroundings this way, I believe there would be less people who felt lonely and unloved. Why? When one has God's peace, they are not lonely. When one has God's love, they are not unloved, but rather loved with a love that will never die, nor falter in strength. Look at 1 Corinthians 13:1-7. If we don't have God's love within us, or are not showing that love, then we, as Christians are useless. If we are useless, then people will go to hell. People who WE could have helped.We all need to remind ourselves of this continuously.

This photo deserves a grand speech, and I admit that I do not have words enough to convey my thoughts when I look at it.  But my question to you is this: how do you want the story to end?


Have a lovely day!
Candace Nicole

Unconditional Love VS. Conditional Love: The Big Issue

Today, I am writing about unconditional love vs. conditional love, and how it affects our walk with God. This has been inside of me for a little while now, and I would like to share my thoughts with you. In our world today, we see two different kinds of love: unconditional and conditional. There are other kinds of love, such as brotherly love and a friend's love. But today, we're only looking at these two.

"What is unconditional love?" you might ask. According to Dictionary.com, unconditional love is "affection with no limits or conditions." If you look at the suffix "un-" it means "not," and is used to convey an opposite. So what does this tell us about conditional love? Conditional love is affection with conditions, such as loving someone for their money. When the money is gone, the love is gone also. There is a condition, an expectation. With unconditional love, you give everything and expect nothing. You love someone whether they have money, or whether they are poor; it does not matter to you. But, even this definition is simply the tip of the iceberg that is unconditional love.

The Greek word for unconditional love is "agape." It is used in this way when describing Jesus Christ's selfless sacrifice to provide salvation to humanity. This love is very important to every Christian, and even non-Christians. Without it, we could not be saved... We would have no hope, no chance of every spending an eternity with God in heaven. But, because God manifested himself as Jesus Christ, and showed unto us this love, we have that chance. Take a minute and imagine: what would life be like if God only chose certain people to spend eternity with Him in heaven? What if you would never have any assurance that you would go to heaven? How would you feel? I know how I would feel. I would feel hopeless, trying so hard to make myself acceptable to God, not knowing if He would turn me away or accept me. But, this is not reality! God has opened His arms to anyone who will receive Him. And I am thankful that I know I have the chance to spend eternity with Him.

Let's look and see what the Bible says about unconditional love.
1 Corinthians 13:1-7 (KJV) Though I speak with the tongues of men and of angels, and have not charity, I am become as sounding brass, or a tinkling cymbal. And though I have the gift of prophecy, and understand all mysteries, and all knowledge; and though I have all faith, so that I could remove mountains, and have not charity, I am nothing. And though I bestow all my goods to feed the poor, and though I give my body to be burned, and have not charity, it profiteth me nothing. Charity suffereth long, and is kind; charity envieth not; charity vaunteth not itself, is not puffed up, Doth not behave itself unseemly, seeketh not her own, is not easily provoked, thinketh no evil; Rejoiceth not in iniquity, but rejoiceth in the truth; Beareth all things, believeth all things, hopeth all things, endureth all things.

John 15:13 (KJV) Greater love hath no man than this, that a man lay down his life for his friends.

These two passages mean so much to me, for they describe unconditional love. I try, with all my strength, to live these verses every day. In the passage in Corinthians, it lists many good deeds that people perform. But it shows that, unless we have love, namely, unconditional love, our deeds are not worth much at all. I can do all of these things, but if I do not have the love of Christ within me, I am nothing, and my works are nothing. I will be so bold as to say this, if we do not love unconditionally, not expecting anything in return for that which we do for others, we are not fulfilling our duties as followers of Christ. And if we are not fulfilling our duties as Christians, then our ministries will be ineffective, our walks with God will be ineffective, and our lives will become selfish and self-centered. There is no place in God's kingdom for selfishness, only selflessness. 

Let's take a closer look at 1 Corinthians 13:4-7. This time we'll read from the NLT. "Love is patient and kind. Love is not jealous or boastful or proud or rude. Love does not demand its own way. Love is not irritable, and it keeps no record of when it has been wronged. It is never glad about injustice but rejoices whenever the truth wins out. Love never gives up, never loses faith, is always hopeful, and endures through every circumstance." Take a good look at these verses. "Love does not demand it's own way." Unconditional love vs. conditional love. Do you demand your own way? Are you always expecting, and rarely giving? Or do you give and expect in return? I sincerely hope your answer to all three questions was, "no." This is so important to a Christian's walk with God. If you are not selfless, and do not love unconditionally, then God cannot bless you. 

Let's look at John 15:13, "Greater love hath no man than this, that a man lay down his life for his friends." This speaks for itself. Imagine you were in a life-or-death situation with someone that you claim to love. If their life was in danger, would you be willing to sacrifice your life to save them? Would you honestly die for them? Look at it this way: there is no way that they can repay you for your actions, especially if you were to die. Knowing that there would be no way they could give you any form of repayment, would you still do it? Or would you let them die? To me, if I was in a life-or-death situation, and someone I loved stepped in and gave their life for mine, if there was any doubt in anyone's mind that that person did not love me, it should be immediately discarded. I would sincerely thank God for that person every day, for the rest of my life. There is no greater love than a man who would give his life for his friends. Loving unconditionally... are you?
Let's look at it from another angle. The person in danger is a complete stranger, and you have never spoken to them before. Would you still try to save them, or would you let them die? This is something that I have to ask myself. If there was a child trapped in a burning building, would you try to save them? If there was a man at gunpoint, would you do everything you could do for him? It is very easy to help an older woman carry her groceries, but if she was being mugged, would you step in and defend her? It's also easy to give yourself for those who are close to you, to those whom you love, but what about strangers? Would you do the same for them? Do we, as followers of Christ, wish to love unconditionally, as He does? Then we should be willing to do those things for strangers, as we are willing to do them for those close to us.

People need to see God's love manifested in this world, and it can only be done through us, His followers. We need to ready ourselves, step up to the plate, if you will, and be willing to truly love as God does, giving all and expecting nothing in return. There is nothing as unproductive as a selfish Christian. In fact, a selfish Christian is not a Christian at all. Yes, it's harsh, but it is true. During His time on earth, was Christ selfish? No. Is God selfish? No. Then we, as Christians, or followers of Christ, should not be selfish, and should love unconditionally.

I wish you a blessed day. :)

Breaking News from the United Nations

It has been said of me that I'm like the UN because I try to keep the peace between people and solve problems. My lovely parents taught me to have problem solving skills. Am I bragging? No. Heaven knows I'm far from perfect. I've had enough experiences to know I'm not.

This post may or may not hold some unpopular opinions. If you don't agree with what I have to say, then that's fine. I'm not looking for affirmation or agreement. I have a right to freedom of speech, and I'm going to use it. The UN (my brain) has been deliberating (thinking) about some things, and I've decided that I should make my voice heard.

Just so everyone is aware: I'm not special. I'm a missionary. Maybe you think this makes me special, but I do not think so. God is no respecter of persons. I am the same as a pastor, a minister, evangelist, music minister, Sunday School teacher, Bible study teacher, or anyone else in ministry. I just have a different job. I *love* my job. No, it's not easy. I left all my family and a church behind for a life in Finland. But you know what? That's ok. I love it here. And, I'm excited that I can share Jesus with other people.

This post is not supporting any political parties, factions, or anything the like. I am only presenting some solutions to common problems.

So, let's get down to business, shall we? Take a deep breath and relax. Here we go.

PROBLEM #1: Complaining about things, e.g., the government, the loggers, the Republicans, the Democrats, the pro-life people, the abortionists, gay marriage, the unions, the schools, world problems, the ecologists...
We've all complained about at least one of these things. We always complain loudest about what we don't agree with most. That's just the way humans are. We complain about the president, Lady Gaga, Congress, the new television show or movie, those Christmas presents that we didn't want, the restaurant that served our meal too slowly, reality television... the list goes on. People complain about EVERYTHING. However, this does not give us reason to do so. Yes, we can have opinions, but when we complain all the time, no one will want to be around us. Have you noticed that even animals don't like to be around an unhappy person? We need to learn how to use our opinions properly, therefore I give you....

THE SOLUTION: BURN your La-Z-Boy and DO something. I know, that's really hard. Those chairs are so comfortable. Ok, don't burn it if you don't want to, but don't complain. Complaining only makes people unhappy, including yourself. If you want to see something done, do it yourself. If you think you'd make a good president, then run. You won't get anywhere sitting around saying, "Well, if I was president, I'd do..." Get out there and make it happen! If you honestly wish something would change, then get out there and do it! Otherwise, nothing will get done. Healthy competition is good. Just don't hate. Please, don't hate. When I see hate, I want to go take a shower and stay there all day just to feel clean again. Hate carries such a terrible stench. Ok, going back on subject. If you have a dream of something that you'd like to see happen, then go do it. Otherwise, nothing will happen, and in your last days here on Earth, you'll wish you had done things differently. I know you can't stop your great-grandmother sending you those Christmas sweaters that are 3 sizes too large, and you have to still wear them when she comes over, but hey, appreciate it. She took the time to do it. You can always gently let her know that you "lost weight" and are 3 sizes smaller now, then offer to send her some new measurements. If you end up with a sweater that's still 3 sizes too large, appreciate it anyway. She loves you enough to do it. Are you musical and tired of the noise that is Lady Gaga? Start a band, make a recording! Tired of reality television? Sign petitions; do what you can to try to get it canceled. Restaurants? Well, maybe that waitress had a bad day. Sometimes, one needs to consider the other side of the situation, rather than their own. Congress? Run! If you think you can assist the country, then go for it. Just DO something!

PROBLEM #2: Selfish people
Oh, this is where it gets tricky. I should probably stop now. Should I? Hm... Maybe I should. SIKE (aka just kidding!)! I'm not going to. Nope. Sorry. Ok, now that we're out of our recliners, put your running shoes on, and let's take off. All people are selfish at least once in their life. That's a fact of human nature. We're selfish. We want things for ourselves. That's why we get the last of the mashed potatoes without asking if anyone would like anymore, ditch to get to the front of the line, or fight over $5 kitchen towels at WalMart on Black Friday. We are selfish. But, you know what? The more selfish you are, the more people will not want to help you or be around you. If you want to keep people around you, then let's look at...

THE SOLUTION: IGNORE yourself every once in a while and FOCUS on someone else. Share your coupons with that nice grandma that shops at the same grocery store as you. She's probably on a pension and doesn't have as much dough as you do. Have a friend in need? Instead of talking about how you NEED those shoes from Salamander, or that new PlayStation, stop and give your friend a hug and ask them if you can do anything. If you're not a hug-gy person, do something else to help that person feel like you want to help them. Offer to buy them a coffee, take them for pizza, have a Halo marathon, go over to their house and watch romances while sobbing into your ice cream... just set yourself aside for a little bit and then see how good it feels. Because it does. I love the feeling that comes when I help a friend in need. Knowing that I did something to help someone feel better gives one such an incredible feeling. A selfish person will never feel that. So, don't be selfish. Put others first. President John F. Kennedy once said, "Ask not what your country can do for you. Ask what you can do for your country." This applies with people, too.

PROBLEM #3: Society and its ability to convince us that we're not pretty enough
Ugh, society. I wish to trod down your gates and burn every Vogue magazine inside. Yes, the clothes are pretty. But, the images of the people are horrifying. Those images burn the concept into our mind that we're not pretty unless we're a size 2 (34), tall, thin, no acne, blonde hair, blue eyes, soft voice... and it brainwashes us. It even does that to men, not just women. That picture of a super-buff guy surrounded by "hot" women? There's probably a guy who isn't really muscular wishing that he could be like that, because that's how you get a "hot" girl. UM, NO. It's not. Yeah, a woman likes a guy to be good looking, but let your gentlemanly character shine forth, and you'll get the girl. You know why? Here's the secret: looks aren't everything. Did you hear that, Hollywood? 17 Magazine? Vogue? Looks aren't everything! Beauty is only skin deep, but ugly runs straight to the bone. What that quote means is that someone may be beautiful on the outside, but the inside could be horribly ugly. If one is beautiful, or handsome, on the inside, then that's all you need. You will be beautiful no matter what you look like. That's the key. Looks aren't everything.
Want to kill the brainwashing? Here's how...


THE SOLUTION: Burn your fashion magazines, get a new bf/gf if you have to, and be yourself.
There are videos right now on YouTube of impressionable young girls asking people if they are beautiful or ugly. And, there are people who are commenting and saying that they're either beautiful or ugly. This is wrong. These girls should be comfortable in their own skin. They shouldn't have to feel like they need to go ask complete strangers if they're beautiful or not. Ladies, go burn those fashion magazines and catalogues. Yes, every single one of them, especially the Victoria's Secret ones. I don't care if you're in the middle of the city and you'll get arrested for having an illegal bonfire. Do it anyway. Make a stand against society and their brainwashing techniques. Ladies, you are beautiful and unique in your own way. Remember, looks aren't everything. In the Bible, in the book of Proverbs, chapter 31, verses 10-31, it speaks of the virtuous woman. She is know by her character, not by her looks. Not once does it say that she was an incredibly beautiful person. It said that she was virtuous because of her character. You want to be beautiful? Start on the inside, and it will shine on the outside. And, if you're in a relationship with a guy that wants you to change who you are, or puts down your looks, then you need to get out of it. Any guy who you'd be in a relationship with needs to respect you and accept you for who you are, and if he doesn't, then he needs to be kicked to the curb. Same thing with you, guys. You don't have to be super buff for us to like you. Muscles ≠ Handsome. Remember your character, gentlemen. And, if you're in a relationship with a girl who berates on your looks and wants you to change who you are, get out of that relationship. You deserve respect just as much as women do.

Ok, everybody, to recap: Burn all your fashion and workout magazines. Reevaluate your relationship, and if your SO expects you to change your looks or says you're not pretty/handsome enough, kick them to the curb. It's emotional abuse, and no one deserves that kind of treatment. Also, be yourself. If you need to not step into a clothing store for weeks to feel comfortable about yourself, do it. Be happy with yourself. Read Proverbs 31 every day, and look in the mirror every day and tell yourself, "I am beautiful just the way I am." Work to let your character shine through, and talk to your friends and ask them to help support you while you do this. If they want to get on the bandwagon, give them support, and help them feel better about themselves. Psalm 139:14 says: "I will praise thee; for I am fearfully and wonderfully made: marvellous are thy works; and that my soul knoweth right well." God made you the way you are; you're a masterpiece. Treat yourself like one.

Well, this UN session is concluded. I hope to have shed some light on some solutions that can make this world a better place. Have a lovely day, everyone! :)

 "Watch your thoughts, they become words. Watch your words, they become actions. Watch your actions, they become habits. Watch your habits, they become your character. Watch your character, it becomes your destiny."